What can I say?

     Heynow. Oh it's been a strange ride for me this past few weeks. First, Angel and I have broken up. About 4 weeks ago, Angel expressed her feelings about me saying "see didn't find me attractive anymore". At the time, we barely saw each other. I would wake up in the morning at 6:45am to be at work at 8:00am. I work 8 to 5pm. She usually works 3pm to 11pm, so we would have about one hour until I had to get in bed and start another day. She was right 4 weeks ago when she said she was in a rut. Honestly, we both were and I didn't know what to do. I tried to make her happy by showing more affection but it didn't work. The break up was essentially my idea. Last Thursday she sent a text saying "I took out my direct deposit" which means her paycheck was not going into our shared account to pay bills. It was a message from her to me saying I'm getting ready to leave you. So I just came right out and texted back "Well, lets make it official". She didn't know what I meant but I said "Lets just break up now. I get my things, you get yours. I feel like I'm not getting any kind of response from you when I show you affection." Later that night we talked it over and settled it. It's weird, right after that I was sorting out my records and dvd's and we were still making jokes like nothing happened. For me, the two weeks between her telling me how she felt and the break up, I was depressed and in a way, I mourned the break up because I kinda knew it was going to happen but I didn't know when. So by me breaking up, I was the one in control. This week she's been with a few friends from Middlesboro and spending the night with them and soon will be roommates with them. I've been alone in this house with no one here besides our dog Sophie. She's been helping me get through this mess. I don't know if Angel and I will be friends but who knows. This sort of thing doesn't work and usually it's a good thing. So I guess, I lost one best friend and two friends from Middlesboro. The only thing keeping in contact is that Angel's car she got on Valentines Day this year, is in my name and we're trying to get it refinanced out of my name and into her's. My brother Casey is really helping me out on that one because he kinda went through that with an ex and it screwed up his credit. Luckily, Angel isn't going to be emptying the shared bank account that is now canceled and I have my own again.
     This next week will be busy for me. I called my boss asking if he was still interested in renovating the office into a place for me to live. Let me back up for a minute. My boss, Mr. Adams, has cancer. He got me onto the engineering company a block away, Vaughn & Melton. So two hours in the morning I go to Mr. Adams to see if there has been any calls or emails and then six hours at V&M. I've been there for two weeks and I like it. I seem to be fitting in, work wise. I'm still a little antisocial around some people there, and I say the wrong things at the wrong time (I think). So before I was hired there, Mr. Adams asked if I would be interested in living in the office. At the time, I was in a relationship and things were okay. Now things have changed and I'll be moving again. Three months in Barbourville and now I'll be back in Middlesboro. Mr. Adams and I are going to talk about the situations about renovating the office into a house. I have questions and he has the answers. I hope everything goes the way I would like it to. That place is like a home to me. I worked there for six years. I've lived in five different locations from Barbourville, to Tazewell, TN to Middlesboro, to Middlesboro again, to Barbourville again. And now back to Middlesboro once again and this time alone. The first move to Middlesboro I had Angel. The other move down the street was for Angel and for more room. Then moved for Angel here to Barbourville so that we could get a dog. I did what I could for the one I loved. And now I'm alone once again. I know this is long entry but I'm venting a little and I don't have any graphics or designs this time. So what can I say? Life has gotten harder so hopefully I'll be able to level up. This week I have $77.88 in my bank account and I haven't been paid by V&M yet. I get paid on the 19th. I'll get about $92 from Mr. Adams for the week and I'll get the pay check the next week since he doesn't feel like coming in the office. I don't blame him, cancer sucks (not that I would know from experience) but at the same time, I'm like "Come on!" It's been busy for me. This week I'll probably pack up some boxes for moving and just have it ready to be packed out this house. We both need to be out by May 1st. Anyway, that was me venting a little and I feel better, I hope. Oh yeah, I fucking hate moving. Later peeps.

Damask Union Jack and Big Ds Redneck Minute

     Heynow! I've been getting into painting and designing graphics. Here are some designs that I've come up with this month, so far:

Damask Union Jack

FOR SALE!

https://www.etsy.com/listing/122830475/damask-union-jack-uk-flag-painting

http://eastky.craigslist.org/art/3597607861.html

Big D's Redneck Minute

A friend of mine knows this guy that is a YouTube personality and he was asking artists to design some t-shirt designs and my friend thought it would be good for me to do a design for him, so here's what I sketched.

Here's his YouTube channel: http://www.youtube.com/user/dled11

Gretsch Hollowbody (Unfinished)

Indiana Jones

Harrison Ford

Han Solo

Harrison Ford

Huddie "Leadbelly" Ledbetter

Freddie Mercury

Queen

     That's all I've got for today. I'm not sure what design I'll be putting on canvas yet but I'm sure I'll do the Gretsch Hollowbody. Originally the color was red but I've noticed that painting red doesn't come out great the first time. I don't want to repaint parts, I just wanna do it once and it looks great. 

     Personal Rant: This week has been a hard one for me. Bills coming at the same time such as: rent, utilities, Angel's car insurance, and Angel's car payment (all together about $1000 in one day, this Friday). Along with Angel's car repair and me having an asthma attack and going to the hospital. I hate Angel's car. That thing has caused nothing but troubles. First, when Angel bought the car in Lexington, the car dealership did her a "favor" by letting her take it for the night and then come back in the morning to see if she wanted to buy it. Of course, she compared it to her previous car and liked it. She bought the car and that was it. Later on Angel didn't like it anymore (with high MPG and it being too big) she wanted to trade it for a different vehicle. Apparently, the car had frame damage. The car dealership had "no knowledge of it" because it wan't on the Carfax. There was another company that has a more detailed Carfax and it clearly showed that it had frame damage and that the dealership covered it up. Fast forward to this week, Angel noticed the Rack n Pinion was messing up again so she took it to the mechanic that "fixed it" the first time. The mechanic is located in Lexington (I think the dealership and the mechanic work together), so they arranged a tow truck to pick up Angel and her car and take it to the shop. They said that the car was not suitable to drive there. The mechanic said "We will tow it up, free of change and take a look at it." Apparently there was "nothing wrong with it" and we were charged $343 for the tow since nothing was wrong. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!? You said you would look at it, told us it was unsuitable to drive, and you find out NOTHINGS WRONG WITH IT?! and she has to drive it back home! A sixteen year old could tell somethings wrong with it just by taking it for a test drive. So Angel is looking into getting a lawyer and settling this thing once and for all. I just want this thing to go away and have this vehicle blocked out of my mind forever. So with the car and bills, I end up coughing my head off so bad that I had to drive to the hospital where Angel works. I get admitted, get a breathing treatment, get shots, get chest x-ray, and get prescriptions. After all that, I don't have enough money to get $80 worth of prescriptions. I've felt so low this week. Being sick, busting my ass at work, going home and designing and painting, stressing about money, stressing about Angel being okay to drive to work. Angel and I are just trying to make a living and this week is/was a perfect storm of shit. I don't know what gets me by, maybe it's just distractions that keep me busy like designing and painting, but I know that Angel keeps me sane in times like these. She takes on the stress even though I don't want her to. She's my safe house, my security blanket. I'm so glad I have her in my life. I always thought there was no one in the world that would get me and my quirks. I always thought I was gonna be alone for the rest of my life. I am so lucky to have her. We just have different work schedules and we never get to see each other anymore. Luckily, she has every Saturday off this month which is ultra rare and I can't wait for Valentine's Day and the Saturdays we'll have together. I know this rant turned into love thing but that's how life goes really. At rock bottom you appreciate the things you have and that helps you climb to the top. Be appreciative of the loved ones you have. There are some people that don't have those people and they sink lower and lower into the abyss. I think those people are the murderers and criminals that never made that kind of love in their soul. I don't know. I just know that this week has been hard, financially. I've felt like the low man on the totem pole, not being able to afford medicine to make me better. I try to phase it out of my mind and think of the loved ones I have and not take them for granted. I've got a few things planned for Angel on Valentines Day, a scavenger hunt perhaps. I just hope she likes it so that I can see the smile on her face and in her eyes, in the end that is want will make me happy again. Cheers mate, later peeps.

Old Drawings, now in Techi-Color

     Heynow, it's now 4:11PM and it's been an uneventful day at work. When I found these old drawing I scanned, I figured I would re-draw them and put color to them. Here's the three that I have done.

(New Colored)

I added a base to the heads like if it where a statue.

(Old Drawing from high school)

(New Colored)

(Old Drawing from high school)

(New Colored) This is my favorite one. I like how the colors go together. 

(Old Drawing from college) I remember drawing this one in college. I was in history class and there were two different pictures in the book so I combined them into this picture. I don't remember why they were in the book, it might have been from someones shirt or something.

     I remember drawing a lot when I was in high school and college and now I don't do it that often. I need to draw more. I think that as people age, we learn more than we did in school. That if you really wanted to learn something, you did the research yourself. If I wanted to become an artist using the computer as my paper, I would learn how to do so. I would learn, if there was any kind of problem, I could fix it myself. Sometimes the world can be a tricky place, dealing with paperwork no one understands but it gets the job done (somehow). I don't know. I just keep thinking about college and see that I can do more but the green pieces of paper called money, doesn't allow me to do so. I'm now 26 and I thought to myself while coloring within the lines, that I am getting older and that I don't see those opportunities that I once did see starting out of college. Anyone can go back to college but they have to accept you first and then take your money for services of learning or unlearning. Anyway, I'm just tired of the same old routine. Going to work, working, and going home from work. I don't know what to do. I'll apply to some colleges to see if I can get in and then figure out if I can go. And it's not just me, it's Angel too. We're in this together and I have to look out for her too. So after coloring this, I thought I would post it and not really get into an inner-dialogue about college. Well, there it is. Later, peeps.

Paintings For Sale and Other Stuff

     Heynow. So the painting thing has kinda burned me out on doing anymore. I have two paintings that were requested and now they have not paid for them. One is over a month old and the other is almost a year old! if I do anymore for anyone, I'm going to get some money up front, like 50% or something. I'm tried of doing a painting and them flaking out and I'm stuck with it somewhere. I still have some paintings up for sale if anyone is interested, I'll put links below:
Angus Young from AC/DC
Boba Fett from Star Wars
Darth Vader from Star Wars
The Beatles "Help!" Album Cover
The Bealtes "Sgt. Peppers" Pop Art

     I also have some other items on Craigslist if anyone wants to look: Camber 12" Crash (Drum Cymbal), Camber C4000 20" Rock Ride (Drum Cymbal), Logitech QuickCam (WebCam), PlayStation 1 System & 16 Games, and a Flip Mino Camcorder.

     Other than that stuff, life is pretty good. Angel and I are happy. Oh yeah, we got new furniture this month from EZ Rentals down the street. I was nervous at first but once anything was setup, it looked awesome. We got an Ashley Couch, Love-seat, a Toshiba 42" Plasma TV (Newer one that doesn't mess up the screen) and a TV stand for $135 a month. That's not bad and if you're late on your payment, they only charge $5. I think that's a good deal. Hopefully, Angel and I will get payments done and everything good happens. I don't know, I just want good things to happen and that money won't be a problem to use for a while.

     Anyway, here are some painting/tattoo/graffiti ideas:

The Bealtes - Apple

The Beatles

Pink Floyd - Dark Side of The Wall (T-shirt Design)

Guitar Tree

(Still working on it)

Thor

Hello Kitty - Maneki Neko

(Angel's Tattoo Idea)

     I guess that's it for now, thanks for checking me out. Later peeps.

I pay how much?

     Heynow. Work Blog! It's 12:30PM now and I've been working the past couple days and haven't been able to type the blog. Anyway, I ate my lunch and I'm listening to the radio a little bit. Late night, I was stressed out and I actually took a bath. Just laying in the tube and relaxing but when I washed my hair, water got into my right ear. I HATE THAT! It's still in my ear and I keep trying to clean it out. I feel like my left ear is super powered and my right ear is deaf. When I was about to put on some music through my ear phones, my boss walked up and scared me. And that freaked me out because I didn't hear him. After listening to the radio, my left ear hurts and feels like it's infected. Ugh, I shouldn't have taking a bath and have just taken a shower.
      I've been watching the weather radar and seeing the snow slowly coming my way. Hopefully, it won't be that bad on the roads and everything. I'm ready for spring. I need to leave early and get to the post office because I need to shop a painting to a friend of mine that lives in California. She really liked my paintings so I'm going to surprise her with a painting and a few other mini gifts. Her birthday was on the 20th so it'll be a few days late.
     Ugh, I hate paying rent. I wish it wasn't really high for me. They know I'm living by myself in a two bedroom apartment because they didn't have any one bedroom apartments available at the time. I might ask them if there's any available now so I can move from one side to the other and my rent would be cheaper. Maybe my neighbors won't be that bad either. It's good to blog because I haven't thought about asking for a one bedroom and I'm just thinking out loud. I don't really know how much cheaper it would be though. I think when I entered 1BR = $325 and 2BR = $450. Now rent has gone up $20 so it might be $345 or $350 for a 1BR. That's still better than $470. It's a good thing that I'm a saver. I'll ask the next time I pay my rent which will be this Friday or Monday. Crap, I just looked out and it's pouring the snow now. I hope I leave early today. My ears are really hurting and irritated. This morning I was really sleepy and debated staying in bed and call in sick. But I didn't and made my lunch and drove here. Anyway, I'm done for now, my ears hurt. My life is exciting, later. 

Connection Error!

     Heynow. It's a home blog of a review of the day. Oh boy, my work computer's monitor just suddenly went blank. Power was still connected but I couldn't see anything. I was just working on something and it goes black. It all started at around 9:00AM. After about two hours of trying to fix it, my boss called his tech friend, Jim. He came over and looked at it and said "Let me take it to the shop and see what I can do." So he took it back and I had nothing to do. He later called and knew the problem "Your power supply is shot." So my boss and Jim went to a computer sales place a few blocks away from the office. They got it, Jim put it in and it worked. At 3:30PM my computer was working again and I made sure to back-up everything I have been working on lately. But within all those hours of the problem and the solution, I had to listen to my boss bitch about computers and how they are worthless. I wish I would have argued the point that they are useful but I didn't and just laughed and nodded my head. His solution to everything that he can't use is to throw it in the creek/river. But sometimes that's a good thing because Jim pointed out that these computers are over 6 years old. So he showed my boss a few new computers on the internet and told him what they could do better than the ones we have and with a great price. So I thought to myself "Yes! Hopefully he'll get an awesome computer and I might get the "old" one. My personal computer is a laptop. The battery is bad so I have to have it charged and the life of the battery is like twenty minutes now. I checked on eBay and I could get one for about $30 but I don't really go anywhere with my laptop so I'm fine. If I ask my boss for the computer, he might actually give it to me because I think I'ma good employee. I do everything he asks once, I'm on time, I get things done early/right. Yes I procrastinate but that's for me do actually do something when there's no time limit. If it needs to be done, I do it. If I have time, I'll do it but I'll goof off a little.
     Anyway, I didn't really have to have anything done today so the computer thing today was okay. Problem in the morning, solution in the afternoon. While Jim had the computer I read some articles in two "Architectural Record" magazines. I read about two cool articles but when I read the "thrice" [ ;) Conan joke] article, my eyes started to get heavy. I was sitting on the couch, very close to my boss in his office. I could hear him too, he was reading a book too (which happens a lot). He often falls asleep too. So I sat on the couch and began to doze off a little. After a few minutes, my head began to hurt and I stopped. I walked around for a while until Jim came back in with the fixed computer. He hooked it back up and started the conversation about new computers. After that conversion, they went to my bosses office to talk some more. I backed-up my work and sent an email. Jim left and soon my boss followed. I soon enough followed too but then I remembered that I needed to go grocery shopping. I ended up at Wal-Mart at 4:20PM on a Friday. It actually wasn't that busy and crowded which was nice for a change. I got all my stuff and started my course home. Since I've been home, I've cleaned and made dinner.
     I think I'll go up to my parents tomorrow and surprise them. I've haven't seen them in about three or four weeks. Hopefully I can deliver my paintings and get some money. I always feel like I'm broke. Which is good and bad I guess. If you're not broke its great but you still feel like you have no money and you still fell like crap for being broke. I think I need to cut coupon's now to save money. Anyway, that was my day today.
     Last night, I was trying to learn the piano intro to "Nineteen Hundred & Eighty Five" by Paul McCartney and I couldn't quite get the timing right. I'll try and practice a little tomorrow. Actually when I was driving home today, I thought about playing drums again but I couldn't. I thought about having a home in Middlesboro and playing in a room where my drum set was and I could play as loud as I can without any reaction from the neighbors. I do miss playing drums. Actually playing any music really loud. Maybe when my contract is up this end of summer, I'll look for a house to rent around my job and have a music room. Rent would be lower than my rent now, my neighbors would be cool and a little far (because of noise), and I would be extremely happy there. I can only dream now. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Did I just blow your mind? My life is exciting, later.

New Camera!

     Heynow, I got my camera! I actually got it yesterday after work. It cost more than I thought because of the 4GB SDHC card and the card reader. The total was about $190. Not good but I'll get by. Here's a picture:

     It's a very good quality camera. It has a feature on there the detects smiles and it takes a picture every time someone smiles, that's awesome. I took a lot of pictures just by smiling. Sometimes I quickly switched over to a different facial expression. Anyway, as soon as I get my other prop, I'll start shotting which will probably be next week. I went to Walgreens to get some lotion and saw an 8GB SDHC card and had to get it because of the space I need for the camera for videos. Anyway, I don't have that much cash for the rest of the week so I'll search for the prop later. Maybe I'll get someone to hangout with when looking for it. Maybe I'll ask them to be in it too as a bonus video. Just thinking of conversations that I probably won't have. Have you ever done something like that? Leave a comment if you have. I'm listening to "Ballad of a Thin Man" by Bob Dylan on my iTunes. I sent a few replies on twitter and some have responded. Well, the replies I've sent are to YouTuber's I like. Actually I need to edit a video I shot yesterday to test out on YouTube. I finished editing and uploading now, it slows my computer down so I'll go and come back and give you a link. New Camera Test! Well, It's 11:34PM now, so I'm going to bed now. My life is exciting, goodnight. 

P.S. Don't forget to follow me on Twitter http://www.twitter.com/erikesemo

It's Gonna Be A Great Day! Money, Re-signing, & New Music!

     HEYNOW! It's 1:59PM but I actually had this blog up and typed but Google Chrome crashed on me and couldn't reload it. Let's see if I can remember what all I had. Okay, as you might know from the last post I am a Howard Stern fan and this morning he has re-signed. Today feels like a good day. Another good part of the day was getting my work check without giving my boss my time sheet. Not only did I get one check, I got another check for my Christmas bonus. At lunch I cashed them and after my lunch I went Christmas shopping and now I'm pretty much done. In my family we do Secret Santa and Chinese Christmas. This years plan was to get a $20 Secret Santa gift (I got Ashley, my sister-in-law) and get a universal $10 Chinese Christmas gift. I'll probably get Kailyn, my niece, something but I need to check with mom on what exactly to get her. The next time I'm at my mom and dad's I'll wrap'em up.
     Another great thing is that I downloaded some new music. Three albums, the first was 2009 "The Resistance" by Muse. I haven't heard it all but so far "Uprising" is a great alternative rock song. The other album was, not so new, "Requiem" by Mozart. I heard almost all of it yesterday and was about to cry because it was so beautiful sounding. In a few brief moments while listening to some classical music I found a better appreciation of music. The third album was this years "As I Call You Down" by Fistful of Mercy. I'm a fan of Dhani Harrison (son of George Harrison) and his other band "Thenewno2" is great too. I haven't heard any of it yet which you might think is weird. I burned the Muse and Fistful of Mercy onto a CD and I like listening to new music in my truck while driving. The reason being is that when I have my iPod, I skip a lot of songs for no reason other than I can but with a CD, your limited and you have to listen to it. If I put the new songs on my iPod, I'll more than likely skip them and go to a song I already know and like. I have the CD's in my track and I'll check of Fistful's album when I drive home today. Okay, in twenty minutes (2:20PM) I think I've covered all I did last time. To make sure I'll just copy & paste this on Office Word in case it crashes again. Now I'll watch my subscribed YouTube videos. Some time has passed and it's now 4:28PM, I've done some work and I'm about ready to head home. Until next time, my life is exciting, later.

Mini Panic Attack

     Heynow. I'm at work and my boss has been gone today. I woke up at 9:15AM (alarm) and was still tired. I don't know why. I went to bed early, I don't get it. Well: I got up, took a shower, got dressed, made my lunch, and I actually got some breakfast. I don't really have breakfast anymore. Anyway I got to work, ate my breakfast, had one call on the answering machine wrote it down, and then got some work done. That's all I've done today. When I got out of my apartment it was snowing. Under my breathe, I said "Crap". Hopping that the roads were not frozen from yesterdays flooding. The roads were fine and not flooded. Actually when I left work yesterday Cumberland Avenue was flooded. It was very high, about above the knee and I was nervous to drive my truck in there. I took a chance to take a detour going to Southeast Community & Tech. College [;)] hopping it wasn't flooded. The roads were fine there but I could see that if the rain didn't stop, it would get worse. Thank goodness I went to college and found out that shortcut route. There is an event on Friday for the 50th anniversary and I was invited. I forgot what time the event is but I'm hopping that I'll see some friends while I'm there.
     I had a mini panic attack last evening. It's the end of the month and my rent is due for next month. My rent is $470 (way too much) and I went to the office to give my landlady, Ruthie, my rent check. I always wondered, they have a piano in the office and I've never see someone play it. So when I was giving her my check, I asked her what is was. As she was writing a receipt, I opened it up and she said it was a pump organ. I've never seen one before so I thought that was cool. When I walked out she told me she'll open it up and I could play some time. I went to my apartment feeling down that my rent is so high. I was wondering if my checking account was right and I could pay so I went online to check my balance. It was lower; I started freaking out on my internet provider because they started online payment and it starts at the end of the month, then DirecTV bill came in at the end of the month. So I was about -$50 if she cashed my check. All these scenarios started playing in my head how to fix this. One was to ask my mom and dad to wire money today so it would work out. Then the simplest answer popped in my head. "Just ask Ruthie to hold the check til Friday, the day after you get paid so you'll have enough." So I called her and asked and she was very nice about it. "It's not a problem". I was very relieved after that, but I still have my doubts until it's done. She could have forgotten and cashed it today, I hope not. I might ask my boss if I can have my Christmas bonus this week so I'll have money in my account. I hate being broke. And I know what you're probably thinking "You can go on a little while on a credit card if you need to". No I can't because I don't have one. I probably need to get one soon. Ugh, I need a better plan. I don't have a five year plan, but at the same time who does? No one knows what's going to happen. My boss could die in a car crash today and I won't be able to pay my rent, I'll have to move out, cancel everything I have to pay (internet, TV, electric, etc.), move back home, find another job and start again. I guess if I simplify it, it's not so bad. Yet the more I think about it, it really sucks.
     My boss came in about ten minutes ago, with his girlfriend. And within 15 minutes: they came in, my boss gave me more paperwork to do, and they both left at 3:40PM. A good day if I wanted to be alone. I guess I'll do the paperwork and leave for the day.
     I did do a painting after the mini panic attack and stuff. I painted a John Lennon painting and I sold it to Kim. I liked it so much I made another one for me and made it green (John's favorite color).

 
     It took about an hour and a half to paint that one. I still had some time to watch some TV and play guitar. Oh well, I'll do the paper work tomorrow. My life is exciting, later.